The Definition of Awkward

I use to have this theory that being awkward was a choice. A person can either go with the flow of life, or they can sit there and say, “This is awkward” and dwell on the uncomfortable situation. I take it all back. Our life in Japan is the definition of awkward. And I’m speaking for myself, Wei, Ellyn, and every other lowly Ensign out here trying to find her way. I can’t tell you how often we use this word in conversation when describing our everyday lives. And the three of us girls do spend a lot of time together between the 20 minute walk to the train station every morning and evening from Jaime’s house, the 10 minute train ride, and the 20 minute walk to base. Then, starting this week we have Baby SWOS together and then we go shopping, come home, make dinner, and go to bed. It’s an unbelievably exhilarating routine. But back to being awkward. First of all, Japan’s humidity is worse than anything I have experience in my life which is saying a lot considering I come from Annapolis, MD, the Mid-Atlantic, where everyday humidity is at 100%. Walking into work, or from school to the ship, I am soaked in sweat, and I feel a little awkward with beads of sweat dripping down my face and my shirt obviously wet as I request permission to come aboard. The best is when you are carrying an absurd amount of things in your hands and you have to salute the flag and show your ID, while balancing everything in one hand and looking completely ridiculous. Next, we have to stand watch. But it isn’t a real watch because we aren’t qualified, it’s called “under instruction,” so we stand there, awkwardly, not really having a purpose other than to observe, ask questions, and learn. Somehow I seem to always be standing in the wrong place as people are moving around me and trying to get things done. And I think, do I salute, what do I say, am I doing this right? Then, there is the fact we are in SRA, our ship is tied up to the pier and covered in scaffolding. Every day I wear a helmet and somehow I lucked out and got some really cool protective eye wear that for some reason reminds me of plebe chem class. Maybe it’s because my goggles are huge and green. So picture me wearing that around all day and what do you think? Awkward. Oh, and don’t let me forget to mention the fact that I am an American living in a foreign country. That means that just about everything I do out in town is uncomfortable…and awkward. Try figuring out what kind of seaweed to buy at the grocery store, or what kind of fish is in the sushi on your plate, or how to get on the right train, or how to cut food with chopsticks, or what “Crunky Nude Balls” are. (They are actually delicious crunchy, chocolate things that kind of taste like crispy M&M’s, don’t worry, I’m sending some home.)When taking the train, I would say it’s awkward to be the lonely white girl staring at the train map for a good 15 minutes, sweating, and then getting on the wrong train and trying to act like everything is just fine. Also, the Japanese are the most polite people in the world and kindly greet you whenever you walk into a store and I just stare blankly, feeling totally rude. I’m working on my Japanese, right now I can introduce myself and say thank you. The last thing I can think of right now is another watch everyone stands at one point and that is shore patrol. Your job is to where your uniform out in the Honch (the bar streets) from 6 pm until midnight or 2 am. You job is pretty much to stalk people and make sure they stay out of trouble. Literally, after walking in circles for hours, you know who is out, who they are with, what ship they are on, how drunk they are…it’s really entertaining to say the least.

I just had to share some of these things with you all to give you a sense of just how funny I find this life out here sometimes. I just have to laugh at how ridiculous and out of place I feel every once in a while. The best part is that all of us feel the same way.

And to follow up on the last entry, I am not getting that apartment. I found one in Zushi, a 15 minute walk from the beach and Jaime’s. It’s also right near the train station, so it’s really convenient. The one problem is that I won’t be able to have a dryer, but I think I’ll live. At least I will feel like I’m saving the environment.